It has been decades since Hockey Night in Canada hasn’t included a Coach’s Corner during the 1st intermission of a Saturday night game. However, that is the prospect hockey fans are facing come this weekend now that Don Cherry and Rogers Sportsnet have officially parted ways. Cherry will be remembered for a lot of things over the years; rants (of course!), messing up players’ names (some say it was intentional, others don’t believe it, and most definitely the suits. The wonderful or insipidly horrid suits, depending on which side of the fashion fence you sit on. With that in mind, let’s take a look back at some of the best of the worst, or possibly worst of the worst. Whatever. Let’s just get started.
5. The Murder Scene Suit
If you were a fan of Dexter during its eight-season run (can we forget the last couple exist?), you have to think this is one everyone’s favorite serial killer by night/blood spatter expert by day would have loved. It looks like someone was shot by a machine gun right in front of him. Perhaps blood isn’t what he was going for here. Perhaps it was some kind of strange Rorschach test printed on suit material.
4. Your grandmother’s curtains from the 1970s suit
What else is there to say? If your grandmother didn’t have curtains and/or a couch that matched this perfectly when you were a kid, you’re obviously well under 40 years of age. Also, Ron MacLean’s face in this photo is the perfect reaction to the suit’s pattern.
3. The Leprechaun attending a rave suit
Get your St. Paddy’s Day soothers ready for a night of dancing under strobe lights to The Pogues. If you’re a fan of Letterkenny, (and if not, figure it out, ya degen!) it seems Squirrelly Dan attempted to replicate this one for the series’ St. Patrick’s Day episode.
2. Those disgusting hard candy that came in buckets during Christmas suit.
Again, maybe you have to be a certain age to remember what I’m getting at here. I remember my mother would always buy these big buckets of hard candy during the Christmas season, and every single one of them were awful. Especially the ones that looked a lot like this suit. They all had a soapy or perfume-type taste than they did a candy one. Horrible.
1. This thing
I can’t even come up with a decent name to describe this abomination. It sort of reminds me of the album art included in some records of psychedelic bands from the 70s. It feels like if you stared at it too long, it would start to move and possibly reveal some grand vision of your purpose in life. That’s only if you drink copious amounts of “special tea” beforehand, though. Seriously, this hurts my eyes.